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tadaima okaeri au for northmagnet
[ as far as an omega's life goes, mafuyu's has been pretty easy. childhood was its own trouble, but even that brought him the gift some people never receive: his first friend who was his best friend who turned out to be his soulmate. the handful of scars he has are moon white having healed long ago: upper right arm, across his back, and one that looks like a peculiar birthmark against the right side of his stomach. that his father hadn't wanted children was bad enough, and then for his supposed son to be born an omega made it worse. they never really talked about it, but mafuyu guesses it was yuki's mom who called the authorities on him. truth be told, he did not know how he felt about it. a little relieved. it meant his mom was safe. he remembers much clearer: the warmth of yuki's hand around his, how he tightened it as if to say don't worry.
sometimes it's weird. yuki is nothing short of a local star edging on that threshold of something bigger and brighter and so alarmingly compelling it makes mafuyu dizzy sometimes. especially when yuki comes back from a show -- the adrenaline and charisma of a shooting star and often the heat of it is focused then entirely on the one who belongs to him. lately, there are more and more shows mafuyu has missed, and he feels badly about it. truly, mafuyu tries to attend as many as he can, but his job keeps him fairly busy -- assistant to a young designer. it means he often gets castoff samples and people think he's better off than he is in the workforce. it means yuki gets some too, but mafuyu never forces him to wear them. it's just, if something is offered to him, and it reminds him of yuki, he'll bring it home and drape it over his preferred chair or fold it neatly on his side of the bed. if yuki happens to wear it, mafuyu's eyes will sparkle in a way not many people have seen.
their days are like this. domestic but a little not. people recognize mafuyu from yuki's socials. he gets stopped in the street apropos of nothing, feels awkward but his core kindness wins out even if sometimes he says things that make people double-take. hiiragi teases him if it ends up on trending things, which sometimes it does. shizu-chan tells him to be careful. syh's popularity is only growing. hiiragi and shizusumi have their own followings, and of course, the band as a whole.
sometimes mafuyu feels a little...
well. no. he's not lonely.
right?
certainly not alone.
right now, mafuyu does not feel that quiet sad heavy feeling anyway though. his scent, like something clean and soft, is bright and there's a faint blush stained across his cheeks. this could be chalked up to the change of seasons, cold enough to see your breath hang in the air whether by the sea or in the heart of the city. but it's not the temperature. the polar opposite of being left behind or too separate, mafuyu feels very much a part of yuki. it might be silly, the sweep of joy he feels at seeing him wearing mafuyu's scarf on a tv spot. no one else knows. well, hyper-fans probably do. but mostly, it's mafuyu. hiiragi. shizusumi. it's this he's thinking of when, somewhat out of the blue, a wave of nausea sweeps through him. when he gets home, it's the first time ever he's relieved yuki is out tonight for another live. mafuyu throws up until sweat mats his shirt to his back. his smell is thick in the bathroom and even most of the apartment. his brow knits. weird.
but it seems to pass.
except it happens again the next day, and the next, and the next. and there are other things too. he's insanely tired. one night, after one of yuki's lives he actually made it to, he falls asleep standing up against the back wall and wakes up to hiiragi chewing him out for it (transparently clear he's just worried and a little alarmed.) his body aches, his chest is sore and he conflates that with his heart. it's the last mis-diagnosis that has him actually going to a doctor.
the real cause elicits a quiet "Oh, I see. Thank you."
.
days go by in too much of a flurry, autumn leaves, guitar chords -- a whirlwind of love and anxiety though all of it seems to shine.
syh's latest single charted very high. yuki is extremely busy. and on top of it all mafuyu is faced with a very frightening truth: they've never talked about this. he can already hear hiiragi asking: how?! because for most pairs mated as long as yuki and mafuyu, it would have come up. but it's mafuyu's fault probably, for having so much trouble with words to begin with. and then there's the naturalness of yuki in his life, a puzzle piece completed by himself. it's what makes their few fights so bad, having very little language or processes in place to handle them like normal people. and now this?
he has to tell him. it's not a decision mafuyu would dare make on his own. over and over, he goes through the many ways he might do this, and looks for an optimal time; none of it seems right.
.
perhaps it's lucky then that one night at around the same time yuki comes back from practice, mafuyu isn't home even though he always, always is. truth be told: after another spell of nausea and sick, mafuyu fell asleep at his desk in the designer's office. he'd told himself he would just rest his eyes for a moment, but then fell asleep for real. he had meant to even text yuki in case he was running late, so he wouldn't worry, but the phone rests in his limp hand curled in his lap. ]
sometimes it's weird. yuki is nothing short of a local star edging on that threshold of something bigger and brighter and so alarmingly compelling it makes mafuyu dizzy sometimes. especially when yuki comes back from a show -- the adrenaline and charisma of a shooting star and often the heat of it is focused then entirely on the one who belongs to him. lately, there are more and more shows mafuyu has missed, and he feels badly about it. truly, mafuyu tries to attend as many as he can, but his job keeps him fairly busy -- assistant to a young designer. it means he often gets castoff samples and people think he's better off than he is in the workforce. it means yuki gets some too, but mafuyu never forces him to wear them. it's just, if something is offered to him, and it reminds him of yuki, he'll bring it home and drape it over his preferred chair or fold it neatly on his side of the bed. if yuki happens to wear it, mafuyu's eyes will sparkle in a way not many people have seen.
their days are like this. domestic but a little not. people recognize mafuyu from yuki's socials. he gets stopped in the street apropos of nothing, feels awkward but his core kindness wins out even if sometimes he says things that make people double-take. hiiragi teases him if it ends up on trending things, which sometimes it does. shizu-chan tells him to be careful. syh's popularity is only growing. hiiragi and shizusumi have their own followings, and of course, the band as a whole.
sometimes mafuyu feels a little...
well. no. he's not lonely.
right?
certainly not alone.
right now, mafuyu does not feel that quiet sad heavy feeling anyway though. his scent, like something clean and soft, is bright and there's a faint blush stained across his cheeks. this could be chalked up to the change of seasons, cold enough to see your breath hang in the air whether by the sea or in the heart of the city. but it's not the temperature. the polar opposite of being left behind or too separate, mafuyu feels very much a part of yuki. it might be silly, the sweep of joy he feels at seeing him wearing mafuyu's scarf on a tv spot. no one else knows. well, hyper-fans probably do. but mostly, it's mafuyu. hiiragi. shizusumi. it's this he's thinking of when, somewhat out of the blue, a wave of nausea sweeps through him. when he gets home, it's the first time ever he's relieved yuki is out tonight for another live. mafuyu throws up until sweat mats his shirt to his back. his smell is thick in the bathroom and even most of the apartment. his brow knits. weird.
but it seems to pass.
except it happens again the next day, and the next, and the next. and there are other things too. he's insanely tired. one night, after one of yuki's lives he actually made it to, he falls asleep standing up against the back wall and wakes up to hiiragi chewing him out for it (transparently clear he's just worried and a little alarmed.) his body aches, his chest is sore and he conflates that with his heart. it's the last mis-diagnosis that has him actually going to a doctor.
the real cause elicits a quiet "Oh, I see. Thank you."
.
days go by in too much of a flurry, autumn leaves, guitar chords -- a whirlwind of love and anxiety though all of it seems to shine.
syh's latest single charted very high. yuki is extremely busy. and on top of it all mafuyu is faced with a very frightening truth: they've never talked about this. he can already hear hiiragi asking: how?! because for most pairs mated as long as yuki and mafuyu, it would have come up. but it's mafuyu's fault probably, for having so much trouble with words to begin with. and then there's the naturalness of yuki in his life, a puzzle piece completed by himself. it's what makes their few fights so bad, having very little language or processes in place to handle them like normal people. and now this?
he has to tell him. it's not a decision mafuyu would dare make on his own. over and over, he goes through the many ways he might do this, and looks for an optimal time; none of it seems right.
.
perhaps it's lucky then that one night at around the same time yuki comes back from practice, mafuyu isn't home even though he always, always is. truth be told: after another spell of nausea and sick, mafuyu fell asleep at his desk in the designer's office. he'd told himself he would just rest his eyes for a moment, but then fell asleep for real. he had meant to even text yuki in case he was running late, so he wouldn't worry, but the phone rests in his limp hand curled in his lap. ]
here's my novel, I hope u like it :') <3
is love at first sight a thing? yuki doesn't know. what he does know is this: mafuyu was small, and scared, and hurt. mafuyu's dad was exactly the kind of alpha yuki had become determined not to be. and, when yuki went home that day, talking too fast and too loud about a little boy whose dad beat him up just because he was born, when his mom called the police, when he held mafuyu's hand as that terrible person was taken away - during all of that, yuki knew, resolutely, he was in love. and he would do anything to protect the precious person standing beside him.
years pass. they laugh, they love, they fight, they make up. mafuyu goes to school, gets a job; yuki barely finishes his exams, spends all his days at the studio, comes home exhausted and sweaty and exhilarated as he talks too fast and too loud about the songs he's writing. syh gets signed to a major label. hiiragi, shizusumi, yuki, and mafuyu live their lives together, sometimes apart but always close. yuki takes all the clothes mafuyu gives him, tucks some away for a later day, keeps some hung up over the closet door so he remembers to wear them to the photoshoot for their new album.
their days are busy, but they're filled with love, and that's all yuki needs. successful or not, he'd always, always choose mafuyu over anyone else, and he does his best to make sure mafuyu knows that, even if it's only through small gestures: wearing his scarf, posting about him on instagram, giving him vip tickets to each and every show no matter whether or not he can attend them. there was a time, during high school, when they grew apart because yuki prioritized the band over their relationship; it took that fight for him to realize what his mom actually meant when she told him: alphas have responsibilities. more than just caring for mafuyu, more than just protecting him, yuki had a responsibility to make sure he knew his alpha was there for him, no matter what.
it didn't take long after that for them to become mated, in body and soul. they got weird looks for it sometimes but yuki couldn't care less: seeing his mark on the back of mafuyu's neck made his heart soar, his soul sing. after that, his music got even better, and syh started making headlines everywhere they went.
of course, being young and in love, yuki could hardly keep his hands off of mafuyu. as busy as they were he snuck in kisses and touches whenever possible; despite mafuyu's weak protests, he even took him when they were out in public sometimes, in change rooms or backstage at a show. mafuyu only grew more attractive as the years passed and, to yuki, no one else could compare.
he had feelings about starting a family, too, but there never seemed to be a good time to bring it up. they were busy, always busy, and yuki sometimes had to go on the road for tours or gigs in far-flung places. they could talk about it later. maybe next month, or the month after. thankfully their moms never bothered them about it, though yuki could see in their eyes how much they wanted it, how happy it would make them; his mom especially, who was alone so often these days, without her husband or son for company. his mom who, for so long, had hoped guiltily that mafuyu would be the person to keep yuki tethered to the earth, to life.
time passes. yuki doesn't notice it at first, mafuyu getting sick; when he does, it seems like a seasonal thing, maybe the flu. it's colder ever day, the trees growing bare, a north wind settling over the city. yuki feeds mafuyu soup and wraps him up in blankets, tries hard to stay home whenever he can, but ultimately their work schedules keep them apart.
call me if it gets worse he'd told mafuyu, and yet that night when he gets home there's no sign of him, no call, nothing. panic grips yuki's heart and for a second he wonders if something awful happened before his rational mind takes over: he knows where mafuyu works. it's not the first time he's stayed late, though he always tells yuki when that's the case. so, as yuki turns on his heel and heads back out the door, he sends mafuyu a text. ]
hey baby <3 everything ok? u still at work?
i'm gonna come pick u up <3 lmk if you want me to bring u anything
i love your novel im sorry this is so short by comparisonn gestures at asleep mafu
ever since the diagnosis, mafuyu had tried to trace it back to 'when'. he thinks it might have been after syh's single a month and a half ago charted at the number one spot. the rock idol scene is more familiar to mafuyu than most, having been with yuki all his life, but there are still aspects that remain foreign as someone not directly in the limelight. what that meant, the increase in fame and popularity and demand...was all a whirlwind. the fact that their time together was less and less should have been obvious but it wasn't at first. off and on mafuyu is thrown right back to high school, before they were mated, when it seemed everything might all fall apart. but then the moments they had found were no different, or if anything, more charged because of the scarcity of them. the other day, trying to trace it backwards, mafuyu's face flushed such a deep pink a stranger asked if he was feeling alright. incredibly embarrassed, he had assured them he was fine, but remembering yuki taking him after that show in the barely-private nature of the changing room had indeed made him lightheaded.
he doesn't entirely understand it, but he knows it's true: how yuki burns brighter with each success, how music is like a personal sun, how he radiates it as such and amplifies it. but it's also glistening, like the light on fresh snow or the undulating movements of a blue sea. and mafuyu loves every aspect of him even if sometimes it also touches upon old fears or insecurities. hands reach for yuki. eyes adore him. the soft hearted jealousy is inevitable. ah that was what it was, mafuyu recalled the other day. yuki had teased him about his pouting and mafuyu...hadn't quite gotten angry. but perhaps he was more pulled taut than he knew that night after the concert. the mark on the back of his neck should be enough shouldn't it? but his pale fingers had curled in the hem of yuki's shirt instinctively, asking him not to go out for the second? third? encore? selfish. so selfish. mafuyu is fairly sure he gets even being an omega wrong, somehow, a touch too demanding.
but yuki is yuki. he had come to him and when mafuyu realized what his intent was, he'd protested at first: not here...yuki...ah-- but he had also wanted it too.
yes, probably it was then.
still asleep in the present, his phone vibrating anxiously across the floor now, mafuyu shivers, perspiration dotting his temple and nape, skin flushed. his hair, longer than it has been in quite some time, drapes in soft waves across his face, the even longer parts held back by a small elastic. the terrible office lighting makes him look sick even though technically, fortunately, this isn't the case. the shirt mafuyu had grabbed this morning looks stylishly oversized, but that was simply because he took one of yuki's shirts, a rarely used button-down that still smelled like him and settled some of mafuyu's nerves. lately he's had more attention not just from alphas but even betas, his scent shifting, and sometimes wearing yuki's clothing helps with that too, since not everyone cares to respect the wedding ring always on his finger. ]
NO APOLOGY NEEDED it's perfect and beautiful and I HAVE EMOTIONS !!!
the risk of it only stoked the flames in his belly higher. that night, after the news that they had reached number one for the very first time, after the show filled with screaming fans and perfect harmonies, after yuki had bathed in the spotlight for what felt like years, it only took one little tug of mafuyu's hand on his shirt to make him shrug off his guitar, grab mafuyu's wrist, and race him into that changeroom without a word to anyone else.
mafuyu isn't like other omegas, and yuki adores it. adores mafuyu's quiet selfishness that isn't really selfish at all; adores the way he tries so hard to be good, to be patient, but can't quite fully accept the fans that throw themselves at yuki; adores the way he murmurs we can't, what if the others find us, yuki --
most of all, yuki adores the way mafuyu melts beneath his touch, hot and flushed and just as desperate for it as yuki himself.
that night had been special, in more ways than one. ways yuki doesn't know just yet.
in the present, yuki's tapping his foot impatiently as the elevator carries him up to the office where mafuyu works. the designer is young but well-renowned already, and his studio takes up the entire floor, filled with fabric and mannequins and storage units stocked with everything they could possibly need. yuki likes the clothes they make; likes how they feel, likes, especially, how they look on mafuyu, who never really dresses up but is so handsome when he does.
it's empty aside from one other assistant, working late as they tidy up scrap bits of cloth and ribbon, and yuki barely takes the time to wave at them in passing before he's striding directly to where he knows mafuyu's desk is. the layout of the office is open and airy, which means yuki spots that sleepy head of hair long before he gets close. the sight of mafuyu like this, his long hair arranged across his face in perfectly messy strands, the slow, rhythmic rising and falling of his body as he breathes - it sends music notes spiralling though yuki's head, and before he realizes it he's composing something new.
he kneels down next to mafuyu, chuckling softly as he reaches for the phone that's been so carelessly left alone. there's worry in his face but he hides it when he speaks, raising one hand to brush his knuckles over the back of mafuyu's cheek. ]
Wake up, sleepyhead.
[ I adore you. ]
i love them so much ;-;
Yuki...
[ soft. no one else is nearby enough to really see them with how yuki is kneeling, or how quiet mafuyu is. his eyes shut involuntarily. he's so sleepy. then he shivers, despite his warmth and forces himself to sit up, wincing a little before it all goes away, hidden behind his normally neutral expression. some of yuki's fans have been supportive of them and it's hard not to know about their relationship with mafuyu all over yuki's socials. some of them, however, find mafuyu to appear cold and even insufficient. such is the life of a rising idol; the public will continue to make its opinions and criticisms even on the thing that is least their business.
they don't see this: how although mafuyu rubs at his sleepy eyes with one hand, the other instinctively reaches out to curl in yuki's sleeve, tugging, not even trying to bring him close; just wanting to touch. his breaths in his chest rattle a little less. he has to tell him, but he doesn't want to here. they don't see this: the smile mafuyu only has for yuki, the tender curve of his mouth that's secret like some kind of unwritten song.
shizusumi once told mafuyu they don't see it because they don't want to, they want mafuyu to be the wrong choice. and mafuyu, unable to understand, just silently nodded.
breathing softly, mafuyu slips the hand from yuki's sleeve up to his hair to pet him there, like he's telling him thank-you and i'm-glad-you're-here all in one small gesture. this close, it's unmistakable, the way mafuyu's scent is a little stronger and a little different, though the closest thing it might remind yuki of is when mafuyu's heat is near; not so of course, but since he hasn't been able to explain to him yet, it would be impossible to guess otherwise.
the other assistant closer to where yuki entered, calls out a good-night as they finish up and mafuyu politely replies, sitting up a little more to wave with his free hand. and then it's just him and yuki. he feels bad. he must have gone home first. was he worried? ah. mafuyu bites the inside of his own cheek. he feels sixteen again in some ways, at odds with the words he needs or wants to use, a blind hand grasping at the surface of the sea, even in the midst of its embrace. ]
kldshgskh I LOVE THEM TOOOOO AUGHHHHH MY HEARTTTTTTTT <333
yuki hates it. out of everything in his life, this is the one thing he can't stand. as much as their manager tells him not to, he does it anyway: he posts about mafuyu, about their lives together, about how deep and intense this love of theirs is. and yet, somehow, people choose not to see it. yuki's heard the things they say, seen the comments before he deletes them: who's that omega? he looks so frail. probably just yuki-kun's cousin or something. do you think they're actually dating? no way.
yuki hates it. he's not allowed to say that, of course. he listens to his manager sometimes, and he knows his big mouth will get him into trouble, so instead he dodges and evades the rumours, the questions, the accusations. and yet he still keeps mafuyu there, right next to him, whenever he can. this is something he will never compromise on.
so, not caring about whoever might see them, he leans in to press his lips against mafuyu's forehead. it's only then that he realizes mafuyu's sweating, his skin a touch too warm. he smells different, too - like his heat is coming. yuki's typically pretty good at noticing it, but maybe he hasn't been paying enough attention lately? guilt chews at his insides and he worries, not for the first time, if he's doing enough. if he's being too selfish, chasing this dream of his.
but mafuyu's fingers thread through his hair, reassuring, and yuki lets out a soft sigh. the other assistant leaves and yuki can't help it; the minute he hears the elevator ding, off in the distance, he reaches up to cup mafuyu's face and kisses him. sweet, tender, questioning. are you alright? did i do something wrong? ]
sobbing about yuki deleting the mean comments prob trying to before mafu sees them
it's not his love that's in question.
so it is natural as anything for mafuyu to sigh, opening his mouth to the tender kiss offered. the hand in yuki's hair slips to the back of his neck, tapered fingers curling there softly. i love you. you didn't do anything wrong...sorry for worrying you...sorry i... unconsciously, mafuyu shivers, and when the kiss ends he lets their noses bump against each other, now that they're alone, and without really thinking of it, slips off of his chair so he's kneeling with yuki. it makes it that much easier to lower his face to press against the juncture of yuki's neck and shoulder, steadying his own breaths by inhaling and exhaling there. and mafuyu's arms adjust to slip around yuki's waist, both hands fisting in the back of his shirt.
tell him....not here...that's an excuse...but...
mafuyu doesn't notice himself, how his own breaths are coming a little too fast. and it's the strangest thing because he isn't afraid of yuki, never has been. the only fear was that one day yuki yoshida would leave him behind in one way or another. and mafuyu had thought in small hours of lonely mornings: maybe i'm not enough. that was before they were mated. they're still bad at having fights. they don't want to have them in the first place, so determining the language and behavior for them is that much harder. not that he's thinking this will be one.
but he doesn't know what it will be either.
his head spins, and his body slumps against yuki's more heavily. ah. yuki smells so good. he's so dizzy. the office lighting seems to spark in his vision.
softly, so softly, ]
Yuki...
[ too dizzy, he closes his eyes and slightly angles his head, pressing the gentlest kiss to the side of yuki's neck. it feels like an apology but also something else as he continues, ]
...I went...to see a doctor--
[ it's terrible timing. the nearly pleasant dizziness gives way to such an abrupt wave of nausea that mafuyu loses his grip on yuki entirely. he goes very still, trying to press it down. and it's a few long moments of mafuyu just severely compartmentalizing his physical feelings, not unlike an episode of dissociation, and his mind overloads: will yuki be happy or sad? disappointed? mafuyu already knows he can't get rid of the baby and doesn't think yuki would ask him. will it go well? male omega pregnancies aren't as fatal as they used to be with modern medicine but the numbers aren't great. if the birth goes well sometimes the child pays the price with different side effects. what did his mother think when he was born? mafuyu's childhood was so eclipsed by his father's emotional and physical rejection, mafuyu can only go by the love she's given him since but what was her first thought? mafuyu doesn't even know what his own is. he's not excited. he's nervous. he's not sad. but he's not happy. and so far his body seems to be having a harder time with it than not.
it's good that the other assistant is gone, though they were a beta anyway. mafuyu's scent floods the immediate vicinity of his desk but without a doubt touches out along even more of the floor. though it seems to want to curl around yuki: mine. please. remind me. tell me.
we'll be okay.
right?
by the time he suppresses the nausea enough to not throw up, he's sweating enough it makes him cold despite his temperature. trying to find his bearings, he wants to start over, try to tell yuki again, but re-settling his breathing takes a while, the office quiet aside from that sound and anything yuki is saying, all heard by mafuyu as if from under water. ]
1000000% that's exactly what he does (also i hit post too early RIP)
yuki has never blamed mafuyu for that difficulty. having a father who hits you when you speak basically ensures you'll grow up with your mouth permanently shut. the fact that yuki gets to hear mafuyu at all is, to him, nothing short of a miracle. he'll take decades of silence if it means mafuyu will say his name even once. only once.
yuki doesn't think much of it when mafuyu slides to the floor, nor when he makes a home for himself against yuki's body the way he's done so many times before. but mafuyu's breathing is wrong, all wrong; he seems unsteady, even though they're on the ground, and when his slight weight settles more firmly against yuki's taller frame the guitarist can't help but frown, concern etching itself into every line on his face.
Yuki, he says, in that tired voice of his, and for a second panic grips yuki's heart so tightly he thinks he might stop breathing. but mafuyu needs him; his omega needs him. so yuki holds him close, takes his own turn at petting mafuyu's hair, thumb brushing through sweat-slick strands as mafuyu continues.
I went... to see a doctor --
yuki's lips part but then mafuyu is so still, too still, as if he's trying to hold something in, to keep himself from spiralling out of control. mafuyu lets go of him and yuki doesn't know what to do, doesn't know how to handle this even though he's seen it before - at least, he thinks he has; he's seen mafuyu dissociate, seen him close up and go into that safe dark space inside his head. it's been a long time, but maybe yuki did something, maybe getting that number one spot was too overwhelming, maybe mafuyu hates him -- ]
Mafuyu?
[ -- but there's his scent, wrapping itself around yuki, suffusing his every pore with the essence of the man he loves, stronger than yuki's ever smelled it, thicker than he's ever felt it. it's almost like mafuyu's body is pleading for him to stay, to protect him, to care for him.
yuki's hand settles gently on mafuyu's shoulder and he starts to hum, something soft and familiar, something from when they were younger. something mafuyu came up with, once upon a time. whenever the words can't be found yuki always falls back on music; it's the closest thing he's got to having his soul speak. he just stays there, close, waiting for mafuyu to come back to him, not forcing him. keeping his worries inside as best he can.
still, by the time mafuyu seems to recover a little, yuki's face has contorted into an intense expression of fear. ]
Do you want to go to the hospital? [ he hears himself say, immediately angry that he can't solve this on his own. ] I think whatever you came down with is getting worse, we should take you to see the doctor again - did he tell you something? Can you tell me, please?
[ oh, he hates how desperate that last word sounds, cracking in the middle. He needs to be strong and brave and good but he's scared, so scared, what if Mafuyu is really sick, what if something happens, what if --
mafuyu's only fear was that, one day, yuki yoshida would leave him. yuki's greatest fear was, is, and always will be losing mafuyu sato. his love. his life. his everything. ]
best soulmate....cries ....i lit did that earlier today w something else and was lke STOP NOT YET
it's okay.
will yuki hate him? irrational questions barrage mafuyu as they have been ever since he found out. but he takes them all and puts them in their own respective boxes, clears a space and tries to find some other way to think of it. thinks about yuki in high school unreservedly marking him. thinks of yuki pulling him aside in the classroom or the hallway, once in the stairwell even despite his soft reluctance that quickly melted away even so. thinks of yuki who always always tries to protect him and thinks this person deserves to be believed in, against all irrational spectres of thought. so even though the thoughts happen, mafuyu diligently puts them away until he can breathe enough, uneven though it is, and say, ]
Mmm-mm. [ he shakes his head: no hospital. not right now at least. then he leans forward to lay his head to yuki's chest, listening to his heartbeat and swearing it's inside one of the many songs yuki sometimes hums to him. ]
But he did...tell me...Yuki...
[ the hand that was on yuki's face has slid to his upper arm, knots in the sleeve there, trembling.
ah. what a terrible mate. he's still so nervous. some of the words the masses have said about him come back at high speed. mafuyu closes his eyes and makes himself continue, voice misleadingly calm with its near typical softness.
just the faintest tinge of something like fear. ]
...he said...the reason I've been sick...I'm...um...
[ his eyes scrunch closed even tighter. why is it so hard? ]
...'ow do you feel...we never talked about it...um... a ... baby.
[ it is, very possibly the most roundabout way of saying he's pregnant, but as mafuyu's scent all but seeks to drown yuki in it, he finally loosens his hold, slightly leaning back, his head bowed, face flushed such a deep pink it really does seem like a bad fever, his eyes a little too bright and wide even facing the floor. another dizzy spell runs through him so he lets his eyes close after all, waiting. ]
the words can't wait to come out kdhfkghjh
still - yuki will take it all.
mafuyu smiles and it's so soft it hurts, so sweet it makes yuki's heart ache. how could he possibly deserve a love like this? something so strong it defeats every weak impulse; something so endless it makes entire galaxies seem finite. yuki hears mafuyu's words in his touch more than he ever could if they were spoken aloud.
sometimes yuki feels so small, so frail, like the world is on his shoulders and there's nothing he can do to keep from being crushed. but then mafuyu extends his hand, tucks himself into yuki's side, hums softly as he looks at yuki with nothing but adoration in his eyes. for him, yuki will take on the weight of the universe without fear.
mafuyu shakes his head and that settles yuki's nerves a little; surely, if he were actually ill, he wouldn't refuse. but then he speaks again, his hold on yuki's sleeve trembling like a newborn leaf on a spring breeze, and the fear curls itself back around yuki's heart.
the reason I've been sick...
is this it? is mafuyu going to tell him he has some awful, uncurable disease? is he going to say they only have a little time left together before he's snatched away? yuki's fear makes his own scent curdle but it's overpowered by mafuyu's, clean like soap, warm like a scarf in the middle of winter, with a hint of something spicy. cinnamon, maybe.
...wait. spicy? mafuyu's never smelled like that before --
we never talked about it...
yuki's breath catches in his throat, his eyes going impossibly wide. he hears the word at the same time his mind conjures up the answer to everything that's been going on these past few weeks. the reason for mafuyu's illness, the solution to why he's been so tired, the answer to every single question that's been filling up yuki's mind.
oh, mafuyu looks so beautiful right now. flushed and sick and dizzy and perfect. yuki's entire world rearranges itself in that instant and his hands reach up without thought or effort, catching mafuyu's cheeks gently, so gently, as if he's made of glass.
he's silent for a long, long moment, simply gazing upon the man he loves. his omega. his -- ]
Mafuyu.
[ his eyes are stinging; when did the tears start to fall? he's smiling, so wide it hurts. his heart's going to beat out of his chest.
a baby. ]
You're - really?
the yuki-vision is so adorable....i love them ugh
[ mafuyu feels yuki's elation and his happiness before he processes it visually. it's more than enough for him to feel relieved too, the last bit of tension slipping out of him. he lets yuki continue to frame his face but he closes his eyes, just tries to focus on breathing. and softly softly softly, [
Sorry...I didn't know how...
[ he trails off but of all people yuki will know what he means.
a few moments pass before mafuyu feels okay enough to open his eyes and when he does, he smiles again at yuki before leaning up to kiss him. it's gentle but also not, the subtle surge of warmth that only a mate will have. that clean scent, enrobing, laced with cinnamon, the very epitome of something comforting in the heart of a winter no matter how tender. every part of mafuyu reaches for yuki and, really, that's been true for most of their lives.
the worries that mafuyu has been carrying aren't gone. telling yuki was the biggest, but now yet exist the rest: what effect will it have on syh? can they even be public about it? mafuyu wouldn't want to keep the child secret anyway, and he knows yuki wouldn't either, so in a way that's not a question and yet he knows it will come up. worry is a caged bird fluttering. it can't be helped. and then there are the more factual concerns: mafuyu's body and how it handles everything through the actual birth, what he should or should not be doing to put the baby in the best possible place for survival and wellness. the list goes on. but, for now, the first thing is done. yuki doesn't seem mad; isn't mad. he's happy.
me too, mafuyu thinks dazedly and even when the kiss stops, their lips still touch, the kind of lover's lingering that made others so uncomfortable in their school days, and so most of the time mafuyu would insist on yuki only doing so when no one was around. even then, he would protest if they were in school still, but most of the time he would give in; because it's yuki. the handful of times he thought no one was around and someone actually was, well, mafuyu still doesn't know: that time with hiiragi in the classroom, another time when yuki seemingly out of nowhere pulled him into a kiss despite being in the middle of the hallway (empty, at least, mafuyu had thought, not realizing another alpha who'd been watching him, was also there), and others.
not that it was necessary. mafuyu isn't anyone else's and he doesn't want to be.
a winter at sea, in love in love in love. ]
it's bc he's looking at mafuyu T_T and that icon...!! squishes his faaaaaaceeeee <333
I didn't know how...
of course he didn't. mafuyu struggles with putting his feelings into words on a good day. holding this secret inside of himself - did it make him even more sick than he should've been? if yuki had been paying more attention, if he had realized earlier, would mafuyu have felt better? what if the stress hurts the baby? oh god, what if --
yuki's mind tries to run away with panic and fear but mafuyu grounds him, kisses him like no one else ever could, and yuki sinks into it with the softest little sound. he smells the cinnamon again and knows what it means, knows there's a life they've created growing inside of mafuyu, and oh he can't stop crying, can't keep the tears from spilling over his cheeks and dripping off his chin.
even if they never talked about it, even if they never really meant for it to happen... is that a bad thing? did they do this the wrong way? yuki can't bring himself to care. later, when he's had time to process his feelings, he'll have time to worry about the things that are filling up mafuyu's mind: what they should and shouldn't do, who they can tell, how they'll deal with the fans and syh's management.
when the kiss ends and mafuyu doesn't pull away yuki can't keep from laughing a little, soft and breathless and filled with joy. with love. with exhilaration. ]
I'm gonna be a dad,
[ is the first thing he says, the words travelling straight from his mind to his mouth without stopping once to think whether or not he should say them. his hands pet at mafuyu's face, his hair, and yuki tips his forehead so it can rest against mafuyu's, not wanting any distance between them in this moment. he would do the same even if the office were filled with other people, never one to care who sees them, not in school and not now.
if anything - he wants them to see. to see that he loves mafuyu deeper and stronger than anything else. to see that he cherishes mafuyu with every fibre of his being. to see the mark he left on mafuyu's skin, proof that they belong to one another, that nothing in the world can ever come between them. ]
How long...?
[ ...have you known? he doesn't finish, eyes wide and bright with questions, excitement, worry. his hands shift to press gently, so gently, against mafuyu's sides, where there may be just the tiniest bit of a bump, and he finally breaks eye contact to look down at where their child is growing. it's surreal, knowing; how long has it been there? the baby. their baby. ]
why are they so precious cries a LOT ABOUT THEM???
it's the only place he would trust to do so.
he wishes they could magically blink home, but doesn't say so, breathing in yuki deeply and feeling better with each one. one of mafuyu's arms slips around yuki's middle as if to remind him this is normal, a normal effect, and he really is fine. warmth surges to mafuyu's face after all anyway, as he realizes being so close and so curled against his alpha, his neediness has woken up again, and it seems so silly that despite his dizziness and spaciness, he just wants yuki to kiss him again, wants yuki to press him down and...and...
the cinnamon is sharp but the overwhelming scent remains mafuyu's, exceptionally soft and clean and warm and tempting the way the end of a long, long day is.
closer, he says without saying, even though it would be hard for them to do so, especially here of all places. they should go home, but getting to his feet seems like more trouble than it's worth so mafuyu just fits himself that much more against yuki. puzzle pieces since they were young and still very much so. if people don't accept them, mafuyu doesn't know what he'll do with a child involved. what of yuki's music? mafuyu's scent wraps around yuki again, even more than before, and it's the very same as when he goes into heat at this point, right down to how his body has a low level tremble perpetually, but the abundant feeling is soothing in and of itself: love. ]
ME TOOO HANDS U TISSUES T_T can't wait for yuki to get symptoms so mafuyu doesn't have to suffer...!
but even that thought, barely formed, is enough to send a surge of protectiveness roaring through yuki's bloodstream. his arms wrap more tightly around mafuyu, holding him close, keeping him safe. yuki has always known he would do anything to keep this boy safe; now, knowing that they have a new life depending on them, he truly understands why some alphas can seem so frightening. he would destroy the world if it meant protecting these two.
mafuyu falls against him, face going from warm flush to ghostly pale, and yuki's fears start piling up in the back of his throat - but, more than that, some innate instinct knows that this is normal. of all the places for mafuyu to feel like this, yuki knows his arms are the safest. he wants to encourage mafuyu to stand, to gather his things, so they can go home and rest, so yuki can start doing everything he needs to do, but mafuyu seems comfortable here, and so yuki cannot bring himself to move.
- and then, that scent: clean, warm, tempting. like a soft bed that beckons at the end of the work day, with fresh sheets and a familiar blanket. the notes curl up into yuki's nose and he can't help chuckling, knowing by heart what mafuyu's body is asking for.
it's strange, how even though they both know it's impossible, it feels as if mafuyu's going into heat. yuki always tries to learn, to understand, but omega biology is a big mystery to him; even when mafuyu's gone through heats before, yuki tended to be at a loss, just standing around and wringing his hands uselessly as mafuyu assured him it was fine, he just needed to rest.
...well. that, and - doing what came naturally.
a memory surfaces then, as he holds mafuyu's body, as that scent fills him and draws his own out in response. wisps of musk and sea air, cold and bright, and beneath that a faint hint of smoke, warm, hungry. their scents that tangle together, that filled up the change room as yuki took mafuyu after the concert, whispering his name over and over and over, spilling inside of him with love on his lips.
at the time, he hadn't noticed, too high on adrenaline and love, but mafuyu had been... he was in heat, wasn't he? back then. it's not unusual for him to knot mafuyu in general, greedy as he is, but that night - it would make sense, wouldn't it? a little more than a month ago.
yuki laughs as the realization dawns on him and he leans down, presses a kiss to the mark that encircles the back of mafuyu's neck, hidden only slightly by long tendrils of hair. ]
Mafuyu, [ he murmurs, teasing, playful. ] I already knocked you up, cutie. You want me to do it again? Just to make sure?
still slayed by the image of yuki at practice satisfying his cravings & HYPER emotional goodluck syh
that night after the concert had been similar despite his protests at first: we'll be caught...they'll hear -- ah...mmn...yuki...yuki... all of it dissolved so fast, the adrenaline of the news of syh's uptic in success, the concert itself, and then the natural demand of mafuyu's body in heat, especially greedy after giving in. yuki had knotted him and mafuyu, all but passed out, had clung to him, whimpering as he felt him perfectly inside, still wanting more. they'd barely made it home before a second round, but somehow if mafuyu were to really think about it, he would know it was in the changing room.
a slight pout to his expression, mafuyu angles up for a kiss, one of his hands fisted in one of yuki's sleeves, the other curled on his shoulder. he's still lightheaded, not quite well feeling; but he's also wave after wave of fever and he should have seen it coming, this effect of the pregnancy as well the doctor had warned him of. later, when the symptoms shift curiously to yuki, it might take his mate by surprise, or perhaps not. one of the great luxuries of mafuyu's life has and will always be yuki, yuki who chose him, though probably yuki could have anyone if he wanted.
the mere thought of yuki with someone else elicits a physical pain for mafuyu though who, gasping as the kiss breaks, tightens his blush tipped fingers in yuki's clothes. ah. he wants more. nuzzling the side of yuki's neck almost more animal like than human, it's a different kind of pout but still one. his already soft tone gets even more muffled against yuki's skin. ]
I...missed you.
[ panted against yuki's neck, the drag of mafuyu's eyelashes to his skin is slow. trying to figure out how to tell yuki the news meant even more reason for mafuyu to let their incompatible schedules keep them apart, save for when yuki was swathing him in blankets and feeding him soup. his body remembers faster what his mind processes now, that they haven't even been together in the same amount of time it's taken mafuyu to finally tell him and oh.
oh.
it's not a true heat, can't be with the life forming in mafuyu now, but the thick of mafuyu's scent and the fever of his body still seem to demand the same acknowledgment. mafuyu says 'i missed you' and means he misses him, he loves him, he needs him. in a way, he feels sometimes like he should thank yuki but doesn't quite know how. for returning his feelings when they had almost reached a point of ending it all, so many years ago now. again even the thought makes mafuyu whimper again into yuki's skin, but without explanation, it sounds no different than want. ]
give this man some pickles STAT! 😂 & hiiragi not touching mafuyu bc he's afraid of hurting the ba
yuki's about to say something else, some other remark about how this is inappropriate workplace behaviour, but then mafuyu looks up at him and fuck he's so cute, his lips all swollen, his face flushed, his eyes shining with desire.
the night of the concert, yuki had seen these things without seeing them. he had looked at mafuyu without realizing the state he'd been in - his heat must have only just started, perhaps even triggered by seeing yuki on stage, alive and filled with joy, radiating the charisma that he'd become so known for. he hadn't thought twice about what they were doing, not before or during or after.
right now, he's close enough to rational to see all these things, and yet he feels much the same. how can he not? mafuyu needs him so clearly, and knowing that the last time they did this put a baby in his belly... ]
...Fuck, [ yuki laughs, weak as he always is in the face of mafuyu's love. and then they're kissing again, hunger bright and sharp on mafuyu's tongue as it slips into his mouth; a growl rises in yuki's throat to meet it, his own body rapidly increasing in temperature as his omega tries to convince him.
when they break apart they barely stop touching: mafuyu nuzzles against him, and in return yuki's hands find their way to his cheeks, his hair, the back of his neck. he doesn't realize it but their scents are filling the entire floor, heady and strong, to the point where anyone who walked by would easily be able to guess what was going on.
so it's a good thing yuki doesn't care if they get caught. ]
You're really okay with doing this here?
[ he asks, but his tone makes it obvious that he's already made up his mind. his hands, too: they've wandered south, mapping out the planes of mafuyu's shoulders, lower back, hips. yuki slips a hand down the back of mafuyu's trousers and slides two fingers against him, down along the crevice of his ass, and groans helplessly when he feels the slick that's already gathered there. ]
omg hiiragi being somehow THE MOST PARANOID of all of them omg cute
mafuyu noses under yuki's jaw, little suckling kisses that leave no real bruises because mafuyu is so gentle, but it always ends up coming off like a tease as a result. pressed this close, the waves of heat radiating off of him are impossible to miss, and somehow he ends up with his legs splayed, knees at either side of yuki's thighs, kneeling against him. he whimpers under his ear, at this higher angle, desperate before he even feels yuki's fingers slide down and inward. he presses back to feel them more, dizzily then mouthing at his ear piercing. salt. sea salt. sunshine. god he missed him.
one of mafuyu's hands winds fingers in yuki's hair over and over, more petting than anything else. and he's so overwhelmed, closing his eyes tightly because to see and feel and hear is too much in the state he's in. he neither hears nor sees that one of the other assistants has come back. it's unavoidable, how the assistant stops dead in his tracks, nose flaring at the obvious presence of what is happening, unable to stop himself from looking around for the source.
poor timing really, as mafuyu's voice escapes again, needier, a molten whine as he curls and buries his face against yuki's shoulder and neck, gasping: please please please. ]
rIGHT OMG T_T I can just see him being like "UH AH UM WHAT DO I... HOW DO I... YOUR BELLY??!!!"
it always, always turns yuki on beyond comprehension. tonight is no different.
he's so warm, especially pressed up against yuki like this; it seems stupid to keep their clothes on, suddenly. but yuki can't get mafuyu undressed with the way they're arranged, and besides, he's too focused on the press of mafuyu against him, his own burgeoning erection obvious as it tents his jeans, seeking out mafuyu's entrance even through the layers of their clothing.
and then mafuyu goes for what he knows is yuki's weakest point: his piercing. a groan shudders through his lungs, muffled only slightly by mafuyu's hair where yuki has pressed his mouth against him, and his hips buck upwards in response. yuki can tell mafuyu's too far gone to be doing any of this purposefully but that doesn't change the fact that he's driving his alpha wild with all the tiny movements and sounds he's making.
yuki's fingers reward him for it, continuing to press and rub at his hole; he's so wet already, it really is just like a regular heat. his fingers press deeper, deeper, slipping between mafuyu's folds only to scissor inside of him, more for the sensation it will cause than to open him up. yuki's pretty sure he could slide in without any sort of prep if he really wanted to.
mafuyu's voice reaches his ear just as another sensation hits yuki's nose: the faint, barely-noticeable scent of another omega. his body tenses reflexively and he stops moving, holding mafuyu tight against him as he hones in on where this mystery person might be.
he does not want to stop, not in the least, but there's some shred of common sense left in his brain, and it tells him that mafuyu could get into very deep trouble for this. ]
mafuyu like ??? yuki laughing at him...poor hiiragi
fortunately for both of them, the omega seems more embarrassed than curious, only looking around a little more before grabbing what he came for off of his desk -- one row over, too close for comfort -- and leaving. but it seems to take ages for him to walk back to the elevators, for the elevator to come, for it to ding closed behind him. his faint traces of wafting scent like eucalyptus all disappears, utterly overwhelmed in seconds by yuki's, hints of mafuyu's in traces all around.
though he's managed to maintain being still, being good, mafuyu has started to shudder. though it isn't a real heat, it reads like one in every sense. if he's honest, mafuyu never paid that much attention to how this works. he has the dizzying curiosity if even already pregnant yuki could give him another. it's enough to make him whine against his shoulder, breaking a little as his hips push down, like he's trying to take yuki's whole beautiful hand inside. they're already impossibly close but mafuyu's need is blinding. he tries to arch into and against yuki as if molding their bodies to each other's shape, another soft moan at the relief in his chest, sore as it's become recently. touch. he needs to be touched.
claimed.
missed you, he thinks and mumbles out loud without realizing it. so much. ]
Ah -- !
[ warm, warmer, warmest. mafuyu burns in yuki's embrace, a refrain of love and want and relief all at once. please he says again and this time it's begging. he can't help it. ]
lmaoooo for real, he always has to suffer... just imagine when HE'S the one who's pregnant lol
thankfully, this isn't really much of a problem at all. it would be embarrassing to get caught, of course, and mafuyu might get a talking-to, but yuki doesn't think he'd lose his job or anything - especially if he explained the situation. yuki would, of course, eagerly take all the blame. after all, if he hadn't come to pick mafuyu up, they wouldn't be splayed out across the office floor, would they?
the assistant steps closer, closer, and for a brief second yuki thinks they'll be seen - but then the footsteps are moving away and he lets out a deep, tense breath, before burying his face in mafuyu's shoulder and laughing silently. ]
Close one, [ he whispers, still making sure to keep his voice down - the assistant is still on the same floor as them, after all - and then he steals mafuyu's lips in a hungry kiss before he can respond.
it's a good thing mafuyu has incredible self-control even in his current state, because the second the elevator dings, the second it's clear they're alone again, mafuyu presses himself down against yuki and the cry it draws from the blond's throat is so loud and visceral there's no way it would go unheard. ]
Fuck, baby, you feel so good --
[ they aren't even naked yet and yuki's already way past turned on, his cock aching where it's trapped beneath fabric and the overwhelming heat of mafuyu's body. it doesn't take much for yuki to notice, also, that mafuyu seems to be rubbing his chest up against yuki in a very particular way, and that makes him wonder... ]
C'mere, cutie.
[ he's grinning as he pulls his hand out of mafuyu's pants, wiggling a little as he grasps his omega's hips and - disappointingly - separates them from one another. it's only for a moment, though; yuki very quickly guides mafuyu to lie down on his back, then goes about grabbing at the hem of his pants to tug them down and off. ]
Gonna take you just like this, [ he's murmuring, almost more to himself than to mafuyu. he sits back on his heels, eyes dark, molten gold as he stares down at the miles of mafuyu's exposed skin, hands moving to unzip his jeans. ] Missed your sweet little pussy so much, Mafuyu, fuck...
[ it's lewd, but he always gets like this when they have sex, especially this kind of sex. hot, needy, desperate. yuki rarely goes into rut - it's just not in his genes - but when he does, he all but loses himself in mafuyu. he doesn't need to rut to get into that kind of headspace, not when mafuyu's begging so sweetly. ]
...they;ll still tease him even when he is...HIIRAGI IM SO SORRY
Mmn...ah...ah... please... Yuki--
[ the way mafuyu bites his lower lip to stifle himself is a habit, not because he feels they need to be quiet, just a physical tic he's never quite been able to get rid of. when he's really turned on, when he's this needy, even in the throes of his heat there's often moments where mafuyu is just coherent enough to be a little embarrassed. he's always relieved yuki doesn't take it personally, the way mafuyu's blush still seems the kind of thing that a virgin would have. the way he can't help how wanton his body gets, slick having already ruined his pants and all but gushing down his thighs. it's like he's already come but he hasn't, though the way his whole body vibrates and hums with heat and flush could make it seem that way.
on top, lately mafuyu has been wearing much looser fit things, even for him, and he feels lucky that's his style often anyway and no one thought anything of it. just mafuyu himself, keenly aware anything even a little too close fitted made him too sensitive, his nipples achingly hard at a mere brush of fabric over and over. because up until the appointment he'd been trying to ignore it, he hasn't really looked at himself. how already, even just a bit over a month, his body is getting even softer, a faint faint glow.
others have noticed the glowiness but dismissed it politely. the way people often will think "oh so and so looks really good lately" in an offhand way, not thinking too hard about it. granted, if they ran into him now it would be different, the reasons all cascading into one hugely obvious truth.
well. it's another good reason to have pilfered yuki's clothes, which all hang gently off of mafuyu, collar hanging open now from the way mafuyu was rubbing himself against yuki everywhere he could just moments earlier. and if the way yuki stares down at him is molten, making mafuyu's heart beat faster and his whole body arch softly in a silent beg, then the way mafuyu looks up at him is bright; a clear adoring intersection of relief (he's happy about it, he's not upset, he wants us...), and love like the snow and sea's own personal sun.
grow with me. stay with me. always.
what mafuyu is still not great at with words, for those who know how to give him time and to wait and to see him, there has always been body language. even when he was a more scared timid individual. a small reach for a sleeve so hiiragi wouldn't run across the street at the wrong time. the lingering of his presence because he trusted shizusumi when he helped him more than once with bullies. remembering yuki's favorite drink from the vending machine. little acts. all adding into what his words couldn't do.
now is like that too, mafuyu's heat overwhelming him even if he could find words otherwise, his body asking for him: please.
please. ]
THEY REALLY WOULD POOR HIIRAGI T_T but his & shizu's baby would be a literal angel i bet lmao
watching mafuyu try to quiet himself is hot too, even though yuki always wants to hear him loud and unashamed. it's a sweet thing, innocent, something mafuyu never seems to be able to shed no matter how many times they do this sort of thing. even now, with a baby in his belly... fuck. the scent of his slick is powerful now, too, freed as mafuyu is from the confines of his clothing, and yuki stares with a glittering smirk as more of it surges out. there's so much... his fingers reach for it instinctively, collecting some of it in order to bring it up to his lips, tongue darting out to taste it as his eyes flick up to meet mafuyu's.
he looks impossibly enticing like this, half-naked and flushed, his loose shirt rumpled and hanging off of him from all the rubbing. yuki kind of wants to take him like this but another idea pushes its way to the forefront of his mind: he takes his free hand and pushes at the hem of mafuyu's (his) shirt, up, up, past beautiful pale skin, exposing his tummy and chest. it's only when mafuyu's nipples come into view that yuki's hand shifts, fingertips gliding over the smooth skin of mafuyu's pecs, pressing gently into the swollen flesh there. a heated sigh heaves from him as his hand keeps going, thumb brushing over a nipple gently before down, down, retracing its earlier path, until --
oh.
oh, mafuyu's stomach is... ]
Fuck, [ he breathes, and the way his voice cracks halfway through is more than enough to give away the depth of emotion he's experiencing in this moment.
mafuyu's belly is already slightly swollen. barely noticeable, impossible through his clothing, but here, like this? laid out before yuki the way he's done so many times before? there's no possible way yuki's eyes would miss it.
the sound that rises in his throat now is a new one: love and possession and pride and hunger. mine, that noise says; you're mine. forever and ever and ever. this is the proof.
mafuyu's body is begging and yuki can never say no, not even when he's in his right mind and not entirely taken over by hormones. he doesn't utter a single coherent word as he positions himself, shoving his own pants down just enough so he can pull himself out, dick achingly hard and dripping precum. he leans down over mafuyu, caging him between his elbows, and catches soft lips in a kiss so deep and needy you'd think they hadn't seen each other for years.
then, easier than anything, he lines himself up and slides in. mafuyu is wet, impossibly hot and wet and ready, and yet somehow he feels just as tight as the first time they did this years and years ago. it's enough to draw a shuddering gasp out of yuki that's muffled by mafuyu's hair as he presses deep, deeper, all the way, until he's buried completely inside his omega. ]
their baby really would be...i hope their kid likes mafuyu The Most LMFDSLK
when he gets like this, he can't help trying to be quiet but also repeatedly failing. his whole body aches for yuki, back arching sharply off the floor as he feels yuki's hands, his nipple hardening even under the faintest brush. his chest hurts and the very brief touch of yuki's palm and fingers elicits a whimper. he's flushed, pink all over, redder in his cheeks, eyes glossy, mouth red and swollen from biting his own lip, mouth now parted because he's gasping for breaths, writhing under yuki in a way that screams his impatience even if he doesn't say anything.
the feeling of yuki touching where his stomach is just starting to show makes him half moan half cry and he bites his lip again, though not long before yuki is kissing him again. even then mafuyu can't seem to stop whimpering with need, hot, heady little noises that thieve into yuki's mouth with the kiss and when the kiss breaks, along the sharp line of his jaw where mafuyu pants unevenly and can't quite stifle his needy sounds as he feels yuki's cock fill him. ]
Mnn..ngh...ah...ahn...Yu-- ah ah mmn--
[ it's instinct, how he tightens around him, shuddering viscerally as he feels him so deep it's hard to breathe. dizzy, wanton, mafuyu has the crazy thought of what if they have more than one? would it be okay? but some of it is just the relief still: that yuki is happy, that yuki wants this one with mafuyu, that yuki even seems pleased that they were able to do this at all. second nature, mafuyu's long legs hitch up at yuki's sides to curl at his waist, and impossibly he feels yuki sink deeper. it's enough to make mafuyu's body jerk off the floor again, sharp and arced and desperate. he's so dizzy he can't see straight, his heart feels too fast. he's in love. more. he doesn't know what else yuki could give him. more. oh. oh he needs -- ]
Yuki -- [ mafuyu's voice breaks, starving. the way he squeezes hard around yuki again says it for him maybe: fill me.
i need you. ]
POOR HIIRAGI LMAO he can't catch a break 😭 his baby will be like "i wanna play with uncle mafuyu!
mafuyu seems so far gone already and yuki hasn't even started moving - he can't, not right away, because mafuyu gets so tight all yuki can do is shudder and force himself to calm down a little, lest he come unwound right then and there. the press of soft lips against his skin draws his attention up and away and yuki laughs, breathless, suddenly sharply aware that they're having sex on the floor of mafuyu's office. ]
Fuckin' amazing, [ he bites out, nuzzling against mafuyu's shoulder and cheek. legs wrap around his waist and he groans as he's pushed deeper, hips shifting so he can grind into mafuyu indulgently, no space left between them. a cruel instinct rises in his chest, one that tells him to tease mafuyu, make him wait until he's crying and begging, but when he hears the other say his name like that --
Yuki. ]
Shit --
[ he curses under his breath as he starts to move, pulling back before sliding back in, not too fast just yet because he doesn't want to accidentally hurt mafuyu. it's not like yuki's that big, not compared to some other alphas, but he isn't small either, and with the way mafuyu is squeezing so tight all around him there's definitely the danger that yuki might be a little too aggressive. ]
Mafuyu, [ he says, and in those syllables are so many meanings: I love you. I want you. Thank you for telling me. Thank you for giving me this chance. You're the only one I want to do this with. ]
Gonna fill you up, [ he promises, starting to move quicker now as he feels mafuyu's slick coating his length, all friction disappearing. ] Gonna put my knot in you. Gonna pump you full --
[ he's gone a little crazy, too, because his own mind is filled with thoughts of breeding mafuyu, of giving him multiples, no matter how impossible it might be. ]
mafuyu like let's play all together okay? LMFDKLS ;;
but right now it's more than enough too: yuki finally starting to move and saying his name and moving faster, each slight push and friction making little noises steal from mafuyu's parted lips. he whines when he hears those words, moaning and turning his head away, his too long hair partially matted to his skin with sweat, the rest fallen astrewn along the line of his pale neck. he's gasping, as if out of breath, as if unable to catch it, but the way he grips yuki, the way his chest heaves, is nothing but a plea for more. ]
Mn...yeah...yes...ah...I need...mmn--
[ somehow he slips his arms up and over yuki's shoulders. the office is drowned in their scents but mafuyu has forgotten where they are. all he sees, all he feels is yuki. it doesn't matter to him right now that much of what his body is demanding is impossible right now. what matters is how yuki promises to give it to him anyway. unfortunately, his body is also a little weak right now, and his legs slip from where they were hooked at yuki's waist. the heat helps, leaving mafuyu deeply pliant, his legs spread open still enough to let yuki fuck him as deep as ever, and when he peers up at him it's from under long lashes, darker for how wet they are. he's ended tearing up anyway, blinking hazily, his whole scent surging around yuki and blooming as if it's the first time. ]
meanwhile yuki just laughing his head off in the background djkhgdfgjh i love these boys AUGH <3
but, for some reason, yuki has never been able to imagine mafuyu giving himself to another like that. maybe it's the trust thing - he's never been close to anyone else the way he is with yuki, never seems to share the kind of quiet communication they've developed with anybody else. yuki, for his own part, has tried hard not to feel jealous at the mere thought of mafuyu picking someone else - but the truth is he is. jealous, and then angry, but at himself rather than the boy he loves. how dare he be so possessive? how dare he expect mafuyu to choose him simply because they've always been together?
but that first kiss, first embrace, first time - they all proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that yuki never needed to worry. the trust they share is implicit, one of a kind, and it's because of that trust that yuki can do what he loves to do: tease and tease and tease until mafuyu's so desperate he can't hide his voice away, can't pretend he doesn't need it more than breathing.
of course, when yuki's in this state, it's impossible to rein himself in long enough for any kind of edging. it doesn't help that mafuyu looks ludicrously gorgeous, sweaty and flushed, his too-long hair unkempt and dark with sweat where it lays over porcelain skin. a song writes itself in yuki's head as he fucks into his omega and there's little he can do but let out his own noises of pleasure, of possession. mine. to love, to have, to protect. forever.
his own hands have made their way to mafuyu's thighs; as they fall open before him yuki grasps at the backs of mafuyu's knees, pushing them up and apart so he can stare down at the sticky mess where their bodies are joined. every thrust brings more slick gushing out and he groans, guttural, dick twitching inside of mafuyu as he thinks about how turned on the other must be, how good he must feel to be making such a mess.
and the scent - god, that scent. every part of mafuyu's essence is in the air now, every molecule of his soul made physical just so yuki can drown in it. he wants to keep going but it's so good, so much, he knows he won't be able to hold on; his knot is already building, swelling at the base of his cock, so that every time he pushes back in it stretches mafuyu's rim wider. ]
You want me to put a baby in you, huh?
[ he's grinning, mouth open wide, eyes flashing as heat builds and builds and builds inside his gut. ]
You always wanted that, didn't you? Always wanted me to knot you, breed you, pump you so full there was no way you couldn't get pregnant -- fuckkk, Mafuyu, you're gonna be such a good mom, fuck fuck fuck --
[ it's weird, but that's just as much of a turn-on as the fact that yuki's already successfully knocked mafuyu up. is it because of the hormones? whatever the reason, thinking about mafuyu holding their child, speaking to it quietly, singing to it... ]
Mafuyu-!!
i love them too..cries imagine all the photos <3 ;3;
too docile of an omega even by conventional standards perhaps, people were prone to bullying mafuyu rather than coming onto him, but mafuyu also found it hard to talk to people even if they were nice to him. he still does, though his work has helped with that; necessity begetting practice begetting learning enough to put systems of language into place. and these days, people do like him generally not because he's docile or quiet even if he is, but because mafuyu's core default is to listen. especially since high school, when not listening closely enough nearly broke him and yuki apart. he never wants to make that mistake again, not with yuki, but not with anyone else either.
because it hurts.
but there's no one else for him. the morning after yuki first claimed him, marked him, mafuyu could not quite put himself back together, a pliant warm collapse of trust and love and a little fear. but yuki had held him and kissed his temple and threaded their fingers and mafuyu had buried his face to his shoulder, just breathing. mine yours mine yours. he's jealous of yuki's fans who get to see him perform all the time, the ones who go to every show. when he's feeling very old fear and injury in his head, he even fears. but it's not yuki's fault, and it's not anything his alpha can do much about. they can only do what they can do.
relief floods him again right alongside such an intense wave of want that mafuyu's whole body tightens, vice like even as he can also feel the swell of yuki's knot. it's so hard still for mafuyu to talk sometimes, but his body is honest. every word yuki praises him with earns a high, aching whine from mafuyu's throat, flushed pink like so much of him. he doesn't realize he's responding after all, out loud, broken moans and gasps flooding the air, mingled with the slick wet sound of yuki fucking into him. ]
Mn...mm...y--yes...please...please...plea-- I can'-- I nee--...
[ he can't finish any words or sentences, mind melting apart as yuki fills him so much it is hard to breathe. mafuyu's chest heaves desperately. he's so dizzy, so warm, his vision blacks out, not even realizing how his own release already came, letting his body relax just enough to feel yuki's knot fully, pushing his cum that much deeper. unconsciously his toes curl, his back faintly arches like a knee jerk reflex. he can't manage more than that, but his body has been so greedy for yuki ever since that first time. and now it's been just long enough they haven't done this. yuki's been busy and mafuyu was scared, not knowing how to tell him. it's want and relief and a thrill too.
the way he mumbles is warm and so laden with sex no one else would recognize it as mafuyu's voice despite the familiar softness, ]
Ah...Yuki...so full...mmn...ah...
[ waves of heat ripple off of mafuyu, the scent of his slick not calmed down at all, one of his hands going low beneath the slight bump of his stomach to where he can feel yuki inside too. with his eyes closed, it almost looks like mafuyu could be asleep if not for that subtle touch. ]